Years ago I made up a new ending for The Wizard of Oz. The story happens just as it did in the original movie - up until the very end where the Wizard is giving them what they want: courage, a brain, a heart, and the ability to go home.
My ultimate wish is to find perfect look-alike actors and build the set just like in the movie, and film this and do some splice trickery to the end of the real movie. Then observe people's reactions while watching it. I guess that would be fun. Maybe after they sat through the bulk of the movie waiting for the happy payoff and then they see this I'd feel kinda guilty.
My dear friend, do you not know
you've always possessed the ability
to have what you want?
(pointing at the axe in
the Tinman's hands)
It is there. Your axe.
His axe is a heart?
No, but it is a tool for acquiring
W..W..We don't understand.
That's right, Mister Wizard. We
really don't understand at all.
Dorthy, my child, you are a very
Oh thank you, Sir. That's just
what Auntie Em always says. She
says I've always been a very
Yes, and do you know the reason you
are so brave?
I . . . I . . . No, I don't know
why. I guess I just am. That's
You are brave because you have
backbone! . . . Good strong
The Wizard turns to the Lion.
Mister Lion, you wish to be brave.
Do you not?
And why is Dorthy so brave?
S..S..She has backbone?
Correct! That is correct, indeed,
my good Sir. So what do you think
it is you need?
--He needs a backbone!
That is right, Mister Scarecrow!
The Scarecrow beams with pride.
Just as you need a brain, and the
Tinman here needs a heart.
So . . . How does my axe have
anything to do with all this?
Well, my friends, Let me ask Dorthy
one last question.
Dorthy, what is it you want? Why
did you come here? What do you
wish of me, my child?
To go home! Oh, Mister Wizard, I
want to go home! I want ever so
much to go home!
And home you shall go.
(to the Tinman)
Tinman? I think you know what to
I - I really don't, sir.
Your axe. Use it. It is the
answer to everything. Send her
home. Send Dorthy home . . . to
the Promised Land!
The Tinman gets a crazed, yet fearful look in his eyes.
What do you mean? Mister Wizard!
What are you saying?!
She has a brain! Do it, Tinman!
I want her backbone!
Dorthy, I . . . It's something I
What?! No! Stop! Don't come any
The Lion and Scarecrow begin closing in on Dorthy, along with
Dorthy, be calm. This is something
that's good for everybody. Just
Yeah, Dorthy, just relax.
NO! NO! Stay back! What is
happening?! Toto, sic! Sic, Toto!
Toto jumps frantically to bite at the Lion.
The Tinman raises the axe over his head.
Dorthy, I'm sorry. I need your
Do it! Do it, my boy!
The Lion and the Scarecrow are watching in anticipatory joy.
No! No! No!
The Tinman swings the axe, and it hits Dorthy directly in the
side of the neck.
Dorthy's eyes glaze over and she falls to the ground. The
axe is affixed to her neck, and it stays there as she falls,
and her body settles into a still position.
The Tinman puts his foot on Dorthy's shoulder, and pries the
axe back out of her neck. It makes a wet, chunky sound as it
finally tears loose.
He swings it again, at her chest this time.
The Tinman reaches down and pulls open the freshly-made chest
wound, and puts his cold, metal hand inside.
The Tinman pulls out her heart, and stands up. He opens a
door in his chest, and slings the heart inside.
I'm so happy for Dorthy.
Yes, she's home now.
Hey, I just realized, I feel love
for Dorthy! I can love! It must
be the new heart!
Well, Tinman, you aren't the only
one who needed something, are you
(to the Lion and
Roll'er over boys.
The Scarecrow and Lion roll Dorthy's limp, heartless body
over, so it is face down.
With the first swing of the axe, the Tinman cuts off the top
of her skull. A fresh glistening pink brain is exposed.
With the second swing, the Tinman opens up her back, exposing
her juicy backbone. He makes a few more whacks to open the
full length of the spine.
Well, have at it, boys!
The Scarecrow and the Lion dive in.
The Scarecrow digs her brains out, and begins eating them.
His emotionless eyes stare blankly into the camera, as a
small bit of brain-pulp drops from his lip.
The Lion stands on Dorthy as he grabs her spine. With a
couple firm and forceful yanks, he manages to tug it loose.
The Lion devours the spine slowly. It is very gristly, and
The Lion and Scarecrow stand up, and join the Tinman.
The Lion stares at Dorthy's disgusting corpse.
You know, normally, the sight of
something like that would terrify
me. But now it doesn't bother me.
You're brave now. See? You have a
backbone. I'm very proud of you
Proud. Adjective. Definition one.
A feeling of self-respect or
pleasure in something by which
you measure you self-worth; or
being a reason for pride.
Definition two. Having or
displaying great dignity or
The Scarecrow looks very happily surprised with himself.
Well done, my brainy friend!
That was amazing!
The Lion begins staring at the Wizard. The Wizard senses the
(talking to Tinman, while
staring at the Wizard)
Hey, let me borrow your axe. I'd
kind'a like to have some brains
like that, myself!
Heck, if you're gonna open him up
too, I think all three of us could
Yes, I want to love.
The Wizard begins backing up slowly, and then turns to run.
The Scarecrow, Tinman, and Lion chase the Wizard down the
long emerald green hallway, and out of sight.
Toto stays behind and laps up the blood of Dorthy.