NEW ENDING FOR THE WIZARD OF OZ

Years ago I made up a new ending for The Wizard of Oz. The story happens just as it did in the original movie - up until the very end where the Wizard is giving them what they want: courage, a brain, a heart, and the ability to go home.

My ultimate wish is to find perfect look-alike actors and build the set just like in the movie, and film this and do some splice trickery to the end of the real movie. Then observe people's reactions while watching it. I guess that would be fun. Maybe after they sat through the bulk of the movie waiting for the happy payoff and then they see this I'd feel kinda guilty.
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WIZARD
(to Tinman)
My dear friend, do you not know
you've always possessed the ability
to have what you want?

TINMAN
Huh?

WIZARD
(pointing at the axe in
the Tinman's hands)
It is there. Your axe.

TINMAN
My axe?

SCARECROW
His axe is a heart?

WIZARD
No, but it is a tool for acquiring
a heart.

LION
W..W..We don't understand.

DORTHY
That's right, Mister Wizard. We
really don't understand at all.

WIZARD
Dorthy, my child, you are a very
brave girl.

DORTHY
Oh thank you, Sir. That's just
what Auntie Em always says. She
says I've always been a very
brave girl.

WIZARD
Yes, and do you know the reason you
are so brave?

DORTHY
I . . . I . . . No, I don't know
why. I guess I just am. That's
all.

WIZARD
You are brave because you have
backbone! . . . Good strong
backbone!

The Wizard turns to the Lion.

LION
Gulp!

WIZARD
Mister Lion, you wish to be brave.
Do you not?

LION
Y..Yes sir.

WIZARD
And why is Dorthy so brave?

LION
S..S..She has backbone?

WIZARD
Correct! That is correct, indeed,
my good Sir. So what do you think
it is you need?

LION
I..I..I..uh, I--

SCARECROW
--He needs a backbone!

WIZARD
That is right, Mister Scarecrow!
Very good!

The Scarecrow beams with pride.

WIZARD
Just as you need a brain, and the
Tinman here needs a heart.

TINMAN
So . . . How does my axe have
anything to do with all this?

WIZARD
(thoughtful pause)
Well, my friends, Let me ask Dorthy
one last question.

DORTHY
(puzzled)
Okay.

WIZARD
Dorthy, what is it you want? Why
did you come here? What do you
wish of me, my child?

DORTHY
To go home! Oh, Mister Wizard, I
want to go home! I want ever so
much to go home!

WIZARD
And home you shall go.
(to the Tinman)
Tinman? I think you know what to
do.

TINMAN
(confused)
I - I really don't, sir.

WIZARD
Your axe. Use it. It is the
answer to everything. Send her
home. Send Dorthy home . . . to
the Promised Land!

The Tinman gets a crazed, yet fearful look in his eyes.

DORTHY
What do you mean? Mister Wizard!
What are you saying?!

SCARECROW
She has a brain! Do it, Tinman!
Do it!

LION
I want her backbone!

TINMAN
(approaching Dorthy)
Dorthy, I . . . It's something I
must do.

DORTHY
What?! No! Stop! Don't come any
closer!

The Lion and Scarecrow begin closing in on Dorthy, along with
the Tinman.

SCARECROW
Dorthy, be calm. This is something
that's good for everybody. Just
relax.

LION
Yeah, Dorthy, just relax.

DORTHY
NO! NO! Stay back! What is
happening?! Toto, sic! Sic, Toto!

Toto jumps frantically to bite at the Lion.

The Tinman raises the axe over his head.

TINMAN
Dorthy, I'm sorry. I need your
heart.

WIZARD
(grinning)
Do it! Do it, my boy!

The Lion and the Scarecrow are watching in anticipatory joy.

DORTHY
No! No! No!

The Tinman swings the axe, and it hits Dorthy directly in the
side of the neck.

Dorthy's eyes glaze over and she falls to the ground. The
axe is affixed to her neck, and it stays there as she falls,
and her body settles into a still position.

The Tinman puts his foot on Dorthy's shoulder, and pries the
axe back out of her neck. It makes a wet, chunky sound as it
finally tears loose.

He swings it again, at her chest this time.

The Tinman reaches down and pulls open the freshly-made chest
wound, and puts his cold, metal hand inside.

The Tinman pulls out her heart, and stands up. He opens a
door in his chest, and slings the heart inside.

TINMAN
I'm so happy for Dorthy.

SCARECROW
Yes, she's home now.

TINMAN
Hey, I just realized, I feel love
for Dorthy! I can love! It must
be the new heart!

LION
Sweet Dorthy.

WIZARD
Well, Tinman, you aren't the only
one who needed something, are you
now?

TINMAN
Oh, Right.
(to the Lion and
Scarecrow)
Roll'er over boys.

The Scarecrow and Lion roll Dorthy's limp, heartless body
over, so it is face down.

With the first swing of the axe, the Tinman cuts off the top
of her skull. A fresh glistening pink brain is exposed.

With the second swing, the Tinman opens up her back, exposing
her juicy backbone. He makes a few more whacks to open the
full length of the spine.

TINMAN
Well, have at it, boys!

The Scarecrow and the Lion dive in.

The Scarecrow digs her brains out, and begins eating them.
His emotionless eyes stare blankly into the camera, as a
small bit of brain-pulp drops from his lip.

The Lion stands on Dorthy as he grabs her spine. With a
couple firm and forceful yanks, he manages to tug it loose.

The Lion devours the spine slowly. It is very gristly, and
crunchy.

The Lion and Scarecrow stand up, and join the Tinman.

The Lion stares at Dorthy's disgusting corpse.

LION
You know, normally, the sight of
something like that would terrify
me. But now it doesn't bother me.

WIZARD
You're brave now. See? You have a
backbone. I'm very proud of you
all.

SCARECROW
Proud. Adjective. Definition one.
A feeling of self-respect or
pleasure in something by which
you measure you self-worth; or
being a reason for pride.
Definition two. Having or
displaying great dignity or
nobility.

The Scarecrow looks very happily surprised with himself.

WIZARD
(wide-eyed surprise)
Well done, my brainy friend!

LION
Wow!

TINMAN
That was amazing!

The Lion begins staring at the Wizard. The Wizard senses the
strange stare.

LION
(talking to Tinman, while
staring at the Wizard)
Hey, let me borrow your axe. I'd
kind'a like to have some brains
like that, myself!

WIZARD
Gulp!

TINMAN
Heck, if you're gonna open him up
too, I think all three of us could
benefit.

SCARECROW
Yes, I want to love.

The Wizard begins backing up slowly, and then turns to run.

WIZARD
AAAA!!!

The Scarecrow, Tinman, and Lion chase the Wizard down the
long emerald green hallway, and out of sight.

Toto stays behind and laps up the blood of Dorthy.

FADE OUT.

THE END.

(Credits)